Thoughts come from people, people don’t come from thoughts.
You can’t solve a problem in the same state of mind that made you aware of it. People don’t have a clue, and they look for help from people in the exact same boat. Boats always have two sides, and they float on water that rests on earth. There is always the earth underneath, even when you think you are adrift on water.
You said such a typical thing! You said that you look for help from people that can’t really help you, because they are in the same boat and in some way you attract them. They can’t help anything, and sometimes they make it worse as a defence because they feel scared. They don’t feel scared enough. Fear heightens awareness if you let yourself feel fear instead of think it. Emotion isn’t evil, and we can own it. It can even break away from circular thought, and be a straight path of action and learning. Then moved beyond.
What do you mean by “enough”? Enough is different for each person. How much feeling will make you act? That is enough.
Act or re-act? Act. Re-acting is emotion. I have been so enraged that I became very calm. I got there not by avoiding anger, but by feeling it.
I noticed that when I felt bad, people around me reacted badly as if my pain could be dangerous for their lives and it wasn’t. You can make choices in that regard, and they aren’t necessarily fake behaviour. They labelled you with the ‘hurt one’, and people associate pain with they themselves getting hurt. It was their emotional response with no ground, and emotion needs to ground. Feeling never is without it. You felt pain. They were emo about your pain. You had ground. They did not.
I never argue with peoples feelings, but I often make them angry because I do argue with their emotions. I’m labelled “autistic”, which roughly means I’m unemotional. People are surprised to hear it, but it is what I’m labelled. All my reactions seem strange as my initial perception is different. There’s a common misunderstanding about emotional reaction, that reactive people are more sensitive. I won’t deny that I’m feeling. Those who know me well know I’m deeply feeling.
Most highly emotional people are the real autistic, because they listen only to themselves. This is part of why I have low social tolerance. The weird signals and thinking I can’t understand is just scary. I developed a sense of inconsistency. Weakness. I see the chinks in the armours. It is effortless really. Tell me how you front, I will tell you what you fear.
How you front? Hmm example, the “scholar” fears that people will see their foolishness. The “real man” fears someone will see them cry. The “socialite” fears everyone is faking. The aloof fear that people will see them as needy.
Taking on “identities” because we don’t dare being ourselves? Indeed. If you center then guess what? Horror of horrors, you are you in all its infinite beauty.
How would you describe a concept like “yourself”? You see beauty in life? That’s you. You feel strong love in your life? That’s you. You feel horror? That’s you too. You are infinite. How do you see the world? All of that is you.
I’m not seeing beauty in relationships. I see shallowness. Does it mean I’m shallow? It could be you fear to probe. That you don’t want to find depth. Don’t want to be that immersed. You want to find depth, and remain detached. Those who go deep find depth. So whatever you would be, see it in the world. You came from it anyway so you will find what you look for. Your focus determines your reality.
Do you think the world is perfect the way it is? I think the world is perfectly what it is. I think people don’t see that. I see what people see the world as being, and they see it as imperfect, and thus their world is and they share it.
How does one get to that point? Want to get anywhere? Center. Meditation or contemplation. Really look at roses. Really pay attention to a rose or perhaps a bug if you’re not afraid of it. Really listen to the sound of your shower, or really be aware that you are breathing. How you are breathing, and how you feel as you breathe that way.
You can meditate on any object, or no object at all. Be really aware of your thinking. But be warned, if you are really aware of your thinking you might realize that you are doing it. What would happen if we thought and knew we were? Maybe we would actually communicate.
I have taken meditation classes and never make time for it. You make time for showers? Shower on purpose. I sort of like listening to everyone’s voice in a mall, though it tends to have less meaning than bird song. It helps me space out.
You are aware of your thoughts, are aware of your feelings, are aware of your senses, this is center.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.