This may sound absurd, but everything is sex. It’s been in the Egyptian Book of the Dead. It’s in the Pantheons of the Gods. Life and death. Fire and earth. It is all sex. Sex is the cycle of creation and destruction. It is the most primal human instinct, and all others stem from it.
Energy, passion, all spiritual forces, stem from the mystery that for lack of a better term is sex, and it is a mystery. We all seek it, and yet we also avoid it. We all want it, but we don’t really want it. It’s perhaps life’s biggest mystery. The mysteries of death and blood are secondary to sex.
As we go about our day, our libidos are involved in more than people might even conventionally recognize as libido. Example. If you take sensual pleasure in the feel of silk against your skin, that is a function of the libido, the élan vital (life force), the drive of life in its most raw form. But here is part of the mystery, we instinctively know that to seek the ultimate fulfillment of our libido we also court the death wish. It is a force, ultimate surcease, a sort of oblivion, a loss of self. Le petite morte.
Sex is called the little death for many reasons. Even in science, the symptoms of intense orgasm are indistinguishable from intense pain. Basically put, there is a fine line between pain and ecstasy. In fact, sadism does not come from the death wish, but from a jaded libido. Many of the extremes we go to stem from either a violation of some inner urge in us or an imbalanced expression of the same urge. Aggression actually stems from an awareness of the death cycle. The death wish and the libido form a sort of yin and yang. You cannot engage the libido and not court the extreme of expression that results in “loss of self”. A desire, in a sense, to be devoured by life. To be devoured in the act. My current avatar is a proper symbol of these precepts.
We often experience the same mysteries of life in intense passion that mystics experience in meditation. The sense of fear and even weeping can arise. Ever see any of the images of hell, and I mean from any culture? Dante even had love as a guide.
People report that “make up sex” is better and more intense. This is unfortunate. Why should it take animosity to make us engage? The sex I speak of is not merely bodies entwined. Sex is more than seeking release, or can be, but we rarely fully engage our partners. We rarely fully engage ourselves. How many of you know people who give their desire for sex much thought, or their sexual identity? Even those who do have some philosophical grasp of it, how often do they shrink away from exploring the truths they discover?
In a sense, a couple never ceases having sex. As I’ve said, in a sense sex is everything. As you are aware of the other, of their energy and spirit, that awareness in and of itself is an intimacy. How often do you detect an exchange you might not have words for, but it is very real and came only from very subtle body language or maybe even none at all? They do happen. The tales of divine lovers, Eros and Psyche.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.