Your tensions are memories. All of them whether intense or more subtle are even potentially scars. Scars are not flexible, but for every tension, especially chronic tensions, there are memories.
Psychic morphism is a fact. It will not stop and neither should it stop, but the psychotic schism that contemporary thought is based on, these models of “real life” and “the real world”, those need to be put aside.
We may be able to revisit elements of our insight now, at a latter date, and recognize that we weren’t all wrong. I strongly suspect this would be true, but as it’s been said, and I don’t know who to correctly attribute it to, you cannot solve a problem in the same state of mind that made you aware of it. The answer for the future of humanity is not some rationalistic atheism. Nor is it any sort of return to “the way it was” or “traditional family values.” No matter how reformed the old prejudices might be, they will still hurt us. We need more. We need immediate experience of the mind in the world, and a willingness to embrace it fully, and not just stay caught up in the notion of “fixing” our irrational minds. How can we fix anything when we have never really experienced it in the first place?
Rationality for its own sake is psychotic. Normalcy for its own sake is psychotic. Tradition for its own sake is psychotic. Would the world really end if we put those aside? Progress for its own sake is psychotic. Input any ideal here, for its own sake is psychotic. Should these things not serve our ends rather than see our lives sacrificed in serving those ends? Whose mind is it anyway?
Now here is an interesting little trick. Our brains blind us to the irregular as long as it’s not so strange as to be alarming or threatening. We most often never perceive it at all, but, and this is the interesting part, we have an instinct, a reflex if you will, that motivates us to imitate other people around us. So as rigid as people might be, if you change your own imprint to suit you better, your changed behaviour will affect others. Maybe you look at purchases in the store just a little longer, or maybe you don’t anguish quite as long as others do, or maybe you engage people in asking about their well being just a little more deeply than other people do. Little things matter. Without thinking about it, they will begin to shift also. What you permit for yourself, you also permit for other people. If you give yourself permission not to yell, to take a deep breath and smile, or walk away, you give them permission to free themselves also.
So you don’t need anyone else’s models. Have a getting to know you session with yourself. Look at how you really feel about things, and go from there.
In parting, I will restate the advice. In all your going, tread gently, because it’s yourself you are walking on.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.