Any experience you have that does not bring you peace, you failed to accept. To the degree you feel removed from a peaceful state, you have a list of rejections.
How is not being lonely due to a correct identity superior to a conditioned sense of existing where one does not question and find they are alone? Is a suspicion of false identity necessarily present?
Ok, let’s get reductionistic. The brain has been shown to engage in a process of reality checking without you choosing. It originally served the purpose of noting any radical changes in the environment to allow proper defensive response. A loud noise and crash in the bushes when everything was previously calm, and they run away from the predator.
Is everything “normal” around me? Yes, it’s the brain checking for stability. The process of conditioning is very Pavlovian, but it isn’t balanced or natural as was evidenced in the irregularity in his dog.
So your brain will continue to reality check even the concepts you hold about who you are, and for most people these are shallow. So the brain finds instability, irregularities, inconsistency and on a very biological level determines threat. It’s not really thinking, and you don’t choose to do it as it’s like breathing or digestion. So the conditioned one dies many little psychological deaths in their experience, and everyone says “that’s normal”. Hence identity, proper and clear sense of identity, is superior. Did I adequately illustrate that?
Yes. You expressed the instinct in the brain that likes things to be “normal” as this is associated with safety. If you are in an environment with less stability, different people, either smoothly in self reflection or after exhausting psychological crisis, you can feel lonely.
Inconsistency is like breathing or digestion? No, the process of reality checking is automatic.
By that method you will know if something is not right and associate that with being out of sync or lonely? It isn’t a method. You don’t have to learn it as your experience will show it.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.