Smiles start diplomacy. Conflict resolution without blood shed. Gallons and gallons of too much blood shed and it wasn’t from passion. Was actually very cold. Indoctrinated passion…unnatural.
Trust is simple. Do you believe the weather is out to get you or that an object meant to trip you? There is such a thing as human nature, but it isn’t a single uniform template. Each person has their own nature, and they also have their social image. These tend not to connect.
Mostly, people focus on their social image. I’m a father. I’m a husband. I’m a professional. And lose any experience of their self nature. Lose even the ability to think about it very effectively. So when someone doesn’t conform to a social image, then they are broken and somehow are not trust worthy.
I trust everyone, at least when I have been in contact with them long enough, because I totally ignore social image. Those symbols and ideas are actually meaningless to me. In a past and gratefully now long dead relationship, the woman repeatedly asked me, “How dare you!?” For me, that was a meaningless question likely predicated on her idea of what my social role was as her partner. But we were fighting and viciously, so even my own sense of fairness was not in the picture.
I often feel like people treat me differently, because I don’t converse as much as they would like me to. Some even treat me like I am incapable of intelligent thought because I’m so quiet. They likely do, my intelligent friend. To what degree are you acting on your self nature?
I always feel I owe people something. What is it you feel you owe people? Either to be funny, or explain myself, or an apology. Just a general feeling of self-deprecation. You will fail at all of these things and not be any less of a valuable person because you fail.
I know I will, as I do. It doesn’t stop the feeling, though. You can wind up feeling insecure when you think bad outcomes will come from it, and actually, they will. Mostly because we aren’t playing to our strengths.
The reason we cannot trust each other, or think we cannot, and the reason many people come to trust me, is this self nature versus social image split.
I think seeing the social image is not a new thing. It’s not new. That’s the problem.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.