One reaches romantic maturity when they have accepted their “opposite” side and instead of looking for their opposite, they look for the truely “other”.
We can build up big resentment when interests are forced on us and many let that happen. Most let that happen.
Become interested in something because it’s popular and get jaded. It’s how corporations and politicians gain so much influence. They are just using an automatic mechanism. How the brain is wired to respond to things, but we do have free will. People just use it very poorly, and one of those most fundamental choices is interest.
Teenage girls are the largest sector of buying potential. Most young women are anxious. Spiking oxytocin levels feed that.
Key into those fundamental urges and you can control society. Yes, the tail wags the dog.
Fear works well too. Fear is actually one of the two primal interests. The other being sex. They override even the desire for food.
What if they fear sex? Then they sex fear as well. This is why women get into abusive even violent relationships. They are attracted to the man they instinctively think can supposedly force them to sexual gratification. What they don’t realize is that same man is brutish and shallow in every way.
Chicks are weird. Men are equally weird as all it takes is really good sex to have a man start thinking some woman is mommy. Men revert to their primal bond if they are otherwise not very emotionally mature. When their oxytocin levels spike after sex, it triggers really early experiences of being cuddled and breast fed, and they start seeing women as care takers. This is perhaps why care taking is seen as the woman’s role. Guys just assume it’s what they should do and want to do.
This is how women can snare a man, as they say. It is also why divorce rates are so high. Most people have all the personal insight of a five year old.
I guess it’s why so many guys love big breasts. They are obsessed. They forget the woman attached to those big boobs. And they forget that they are men and have adult male needs, like the need to relate to a peer.
Often the woman is not happy with the attention they get. Indeed. Women may want children, but not as mates. What they want as a mate is an ally, and what they want as an ally depends on how they have learned to get by in the world.
It’s really frightening for a teen with a big chest to see adult men staring. I have had teenage girls actually try to flirt with me for their own amusement. Then their tone changes as I show an obvious disinterest. I hear vague references sometimes even to my being “gay”. I am just not in the least interested in juveniles, not intimately.
They are exploring their power. Well, there is a flip side to that. Many men are emotionally stunted, so sexually they stay the twelve year old boy with all the problems that entails. Awkward sexual behaviour, immature excitement leading to premature climax, all the related nonsense.
Though now I think it’s cute when I see a twelve year old boy looking at a lady he likes. Sexual instinct is not a reflection of character. Even if a grown man recognizes a teen has a mature figure, it doesn’t mean he wants to bed her.
It seems like our interests are all rooted in sex or fear? We aren’t socialized well, but yes, ultimately all of our interests are rooted in sex and death actually. We have an attraction to fear because the fear of a prey animal means supper, and the fear of a subordinate human means more opportunities for us.
So today buying a date some dinner in a nice restaurant is saying to her, “Hey, I’m not going to let you starve. I can provide well for you.” It’s not actually a mystery. Whether women think it’s flattering or not, being taken care of is an aphrodisiac. It leads hormonally to sexual desire, but in the modern world, and this has always been true, what constitutes being taken care of can differ. An example would be Cleopatra. She had no need of wealth or any material comforts, but the strength of mind and experience shown by Mark Antony was hugely attractive.
You have the inner animal, but you also have the thinking being in you as well.
Hence so many conversations eventually end up in sex and death, and we wonder how did we get here. It’s effortless to go there.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.