Relativity is inherently the denial of realism. It denies shared experience.
What would you say is the oldest sport that we still play today? Running and wrestling. The only one older than these two is sex, but today we don’t let that be sport.
Sex is a competition? Instinctively, it is. Instinctively, the sexual act is undertaken as an expression of passions, all passion, channelled into the act of union itself. Violence itself is not a passion, it’s a behaviour.
So if I’m done first, I win? Actually, no. If you are done first and refuse to engage any further, you lose. It’s a test of endurance, among other things.
If you’re done first you have failed to subdue the other. Exactly. This is depicted rather bluntly in pretty much all pagan faiths. Goddess subduing God, then being subdued by the God. It was considered to be the spirit behind the seasons and all cycles.
So it’s like checkmating your mate? Exactly. The term check mate comes from an older Persian term. Shah mat, which means the king is dead. It is perhaps why they call sexual release the little death.
I thought it was the united experience of ecstasy that was the desired result. It is, but ecstasy is not achieved unless the lovers lose themselves.
And unite. Indeed. While orgasm is in fact superficial, incidental like a good sneeze say, what can be achieved is catharsis. The release of the passions, and is much more deeply satisfying that simple release of physical tension. Ever struggle with something so long you just had to give up in exhaustion? This is ecstasy. This is the ultimate sport.
The purpose of the sexual sport is to engage the attention of your lover like engaging the attention of the Gods in ritual. The most primal human communication is physical, body language. Our very first sense to develop is touch. So our most primal level of consciousness also involves touch, and the most touching you can possibly do of another is in sexual congress.
Doesn’t the physical release put you in an altered state also? It can, though for most people the altered state is shallow, unsatisfying. They feel half done and blame it on their partners. This is unfair as neither usually understands the range of what is possible or the depth of communication that can be reached. But that is perhaps a totally different topic. Suffice it to say the old wisdom of “know thyself” includes knowing the body as well.
Like that movie “What Women Want” where Mel Gibson can read women’s thoughts and becomes like a sex God. That is not outside of the realm of possibility. It just takes more work and insight than most men are comfortable with. Men have low self esteem and poor body image to deal with as well. This isn’t just a female preoccupation. Men just refuse to talk about it.
I suspect it’s our culture that has done this to us, lack of teaching. Indeed. Defining sex as profanity, making all sex profanity. Admittedly, some sexual practices are indeed unhealthy, but we don’t have to throw the baby out with the bath water as they say. Going to go bugger a sheep is an excellent recipe for catching the clap, thus I say unhealthy.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.