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Why Do We Regret?
I will begin by defining regret in contrast to other states. What does it mean to regret nothing? If I say I regret nothing, I am saying my actions are totally in keeping with my intention, is this not so? True, but what if the outcome is not in keeping with the intention? That is…
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Attention To Pattern
I feel forced to resort to metaphor now. Ever notice a tree as it grows can break even something much “tougher” than it? If close to a foundation it can damage it, so yes. And if not break it then grow around it, thus still negating the negativity of its presence? Humans are more quickly…
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True To Yourself
Onto what’s right about regret. You can be aware of inequities in your intentions, and actions, and consequences. This deduction is actually very useful and a source for self informed and self directed decision making, but does “future regret” have the negative emotional load? The emotion is how your body mind gives you feedback on…
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Move Or Be Moved
What is static? Static is not order, and it’s not unchanging. It’s just unplugged, unadaptive. We are not meant to be neutral. Even if you see emotion as something to be managed and subordinated to reason, your thinking is still not functional if a zero sum is your goal. Zero sum thinking leads one to…
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Not Trying
There is the doing aspect, being in the moment, but what of planning the events and adapting to situations where it arises? That’s its own doing, and your quality of thinking will be much better if you allow your mind events to process as they inevitably will. This will reduce a lot of the clouding…
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Dealing With Regret
I fluctuate back and forth between regret and acceptance. Regret is an internal struggle that you don’t have to do. I feel I’ve learned a lot from what I’ve done, but sometimes the regret of all of it comes back. I’ll be fine for a while, but hear or see something that sets me off.…
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Mis-Identified Intent
Regret is a complicated feeling state, and the mind has more depth than is commonly considered when we tackle our challenges in daily life. Let’s start with the root of consciousness, the subconscious mind. It has been established that it perceives only identities, presences, what is. In hypnosis, they cannot make a negative suggestion. Like…
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Take Back Thinking
I make the point of being present in my life, experiencing consciously. This is a good attitude to sustain. It’s also potentially challenging as the mind is very busy and quite good at attention getting. This is its function, but does that mean we have to have even that conflict? The thinking mind has no intention.…
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Congruent With Attention
If someone tells me their regrets, I can tell both their attention focus and their intention, but does that mean they are locked into that state? They don’t have to be. Why not? State of regret. They could choose present moment acceptance? True, but not quite as cut and dry as that. Your intention is…
Category: Regret
The source of our regret is not failed outcomes, it’s false identification. We look at outcomes and incorrectly interpret them as a reflection of self, and declare that “we failed” rather than seeing the intended outcome as just not yet achieved. When we fail to achieve our outcome, we often create an oppositional relationship with one or more entities, people, God, life, the world. This relationship exists only in our heads.
What determines the character of your actions is the focus of your attention. Your attention determines your reality. Your actions will always be in coherence with your reality, which is your attention. If your attention is on cheating, then everything and everyone is a cheat. When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves – regret for the past and fear of the future.” Fulton Oursler
“Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.” Sydney Smith (English Clergyman, Essayist and Wit, 1771-1845)
“Forget regret, or life is yours to miss.” Jonathan Larson