You can learn from good things. It requires a different skill set maybe. Today’s culture doesn’t teach us. It teaches us to solve problems. To look for issues and “fix” that.
The shadow consciousness theory of psychology is the notion of suppression of our selves by our judgement. When we see other people doing what we have stopped ourselves from doing, it traumatizes the shadow consciousness. Our judgement traumatizes it reflexively. Being moral entrepreneurs, it brings doubts to our certainties, or enforces our bitterness and jealousy of others freedoms, because we’re not letting our selves be as free.
There is a third point between our normal consciousness and our shadow consciousness, but most people don’t seek this third point. They see what they have chosen to believe, their judgement. They see what is in them but they have chosen to reject, that shadow consciousness. But both stem from a more elemental consciousness that only has life instinct motivating it.
People who annoy us are usually just reflecting that which we are trying to reject in ourselves. If it were totally foreign, we might see it as weird, but wouldn’t find it disturbing. Other people’s judgements of us simply trigger our own insecurities. Without that insecurity the judgement may be amusing. They judge us in the way we judge ourselves. We show people how to treat us, then blame them when they do.
If we have freedom to “choose” any state we wish, and we get to the point where we no longer judge or even care what state either ourselves or others partake in, what would be our most natural mode of operation? Would it be personal survival, would it be spiritual enlightenment, or would it be something different? In that case, you approach the third point. You find that there is a realm of expression that forms a very natural and powerful point to choose your state from, like an artist. I was once told that my personality was like a work of art. You will express through your choice of being state. Create from a deeper truth. Call that enlightenment if you want.
Is it more of an absorption of “truth” and not our application of it into the world that would be our natural and most true state of being? Nothing to do about anything as it is already in motion? Paradoxical, but no we aren’t meant to be passive observers. We have the natural inclination to act and react, but how we relate to the dynamic that is life is very personal.
You will judge. This is inevitable, and it is hardwired into us. If you stub your toe, your body will likely make it very clear that hurts and you will have a natural disinclination to stub your toe again. But yes, the trick is knowing judgement for what it is. Not thinking it to be reality, and in knowing this you can choose differently rather than in reaction to your judgments. Look at yourself if you find yourself making harsh judgements of someone else. If you are unhappy, it’s because you are unhappy. Unhappiness usually has an internal cause you can dig into, and even being wrapped in fine silk can be suffocating. The judge and the judged are in a relationship for a reason, both confined.
Damocles slept with a sword over his bed and suspended by a thread, for a reason. To remind himself that as he judged, so was he judged. Two edges. He didn’t deny that it happens, but you don’t judge in freedom, ever. Anger arises as a judgement, contempt. Actually, most negative emotions, maybe even all, arise as judgements. What we define as emotion arises as judgement. If you decide you like someone, that is a judgement. If you decide you don’t, that is also a judgement. The emotions are good or bad to the degree that they strengthen or weaken you, empower or disempower. Example. Let’s say I get angry at the one I love. I want to be loving and affectionate, but “can’t” because I’m angry. It is also an opportunity to dig and learn more about yourself.
There is no doom anywhere. There are those who seek punishment. They have already judged themselves inside. In their case, being given punishment can inspire. It can help them see the world as just, and in that trusting in justice, they change.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.