Choice Not Understood


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I don’t attend church because of my inappropriate urges to giggle and sometimes laugh out loud. An impulse I cannot seem to control in that environment. Hence my nonparticipation in things sometimes. You shouldn’t be cracking up during solemn events. Indeed. Some interpret that as a lack of empathy or sensitivity, or even as evidence of hostility when in fact it may be no such thing. Just as we don’t process our own emotions well, we don’t interpret other people much better.

I’m not sure why that impulse happens, but would like to. Well, the impulses become connected for a reason. It’s often in very early experience. But when we understand our behaviours as impulses rather than the dramatic blurbs of our emotion/memories, we can then look at how each behaviour shows up and see how they flow together naturally. There is a logic of sorts to it.

When a conflict of impulse is occurring, is it simply that a choice is being ignored for the sake of continuing the conflict? A conflict comes up when the choice is not understood. When we have habits of thought or emotion, these really being the same thing, that tell us that we have no choice in these situations.

I guess the opposite of impulse is not being able to make any choice at all? Staring for hours at two shirts and thinking you can only have one. Exactly. But which one when it’s buy one get one free. Indeed, even intellectual knowledge often doesn’t break the strange loops we get into.

All impulse has one defining characteristic. Impulses are all life affirmative. It’s the conflicts we set up regarding our impulses that turn them into self destructive behaviours.

Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.

Travis Saunders
Dragon Intuitive
~science,mysticism,spirituality~


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