The way of thought is the way of definition. A focusing of the minds eye to see details better. People mistake control for artifice, though artifice inevitably fails.
Finding peace. We all try to do it. It is a long standing objective in philosophy and religion both, if not the oldest. Yet we seem to have a haphazard grasp of it at best. A big part of this is we seek it elsewhere. It’s forever elsewhere. Peace on earth, peace with other nations, peace with your neighbour. Isn’t it strange how this seems to work poorly if at all? Yet we keep doing it, and feeling bad because we think when something comes up it’s our fault.
Depends on the situation doesn’t it? If it depends, what happens if the depended on thing is lost? If it depends on situation, then our situations change like crazy and there could be no peace.
Isn’t it most of all about peace with ourselves? Yes, and this is actually my point. We think we can find peace by fighting with ourselves. We think we can find inner peace by being “better” versions of ourselves.
The only time I can remember to have had peace with myself is as a child, and I don’t ever see that changing. Do children avoid things about themselves? They usually don’t even know they need to. Actually young children tend to just act; act from their hearts, act from their inquisitive little heads, with no assumptions. They just want to know and see and do. Why are we different from that?
Until they develop the ego, and with that the questioning starts too? Actually questioning starts before ego. A very ego free question is “why?”.
It’s not easy to forgive ourselves, and everyone crosses their own “norms and values” once? This is true. That is all too common. The child doesn’t ask ‘why do I do this’. They don’t ask because they don’t need to, and a child doesn’t have the weight of judgement on themselves. They are taught judgement. It isn’t instinct. Children know ‘I am me’.
I always have felt a lot of responsibility myself, for my sisters and so on. I did judge stuff on my own, and I think I am not the only one who did that? Children aren’t forced to judge. They learn from watching, but a young child can say “I am me”. Once in my twenties, I had gone for a while without food and shelter, or human contact. I was stopped once and asked my name. I was surprised that I couldn’t answer it immediately. The only thought I had was “I am me”. I was able to answer but it took a bit, and they gave me a strange look.
I have a Sheltie that herds children as if they were sheep. It is bred into him. I wonder how many of our thoughts and actions are conditioned responses to our “breed”? Which brings us back on point. We don’t find peace by control. Control creates conflict and even defiance is a form of control.
But by being laid back? I’m not advocating nihilism or anarchy either. But by being at peace with what we are, our virtues and our vices.
Surrender is quite okay? Yes, surrender. But not disengagement. You don’t stop living. Control tells us we need to stop. Stop being angry, stop crying, stop being so silly, do these things give us peace?
I’ve been asked if I’m Buddhist cause I’m peaceful. Many Buddhists do find peace on their way. They discover something in themselves that is understandable to them by the Buddhist teachings. But even the Buddha said that one does not have to be a Buddha. That it isn’t something to do. But when you see, you will be a Buddha without doing anything.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.