In the age of naming, all facets of the name were understood. The speaking brought the essence to form.
Let’s look at the individual. We don’t generally want to subsume ourselves in the social system, just like heart muscle cells don’t normally volunteer for digestion.
It’s a constant struggle between socialization and individuality. That is the problem, struggle. It can even lead to the equivalent of the social cancer tumor, something forcing itself into a place where it cannot contribute or survive. Like having kidney tissue in your brain, it’s perfectly good kidney tissue, but it does damage the brain. The anti-social person is every bit the equal of the more social person, but they are connecting poorly.
You mean the ‘trying to fit in’ syndrome? Yes.
Without any intention on your own, you will try to identify anyone you meet and identify yourself in the context of relating to them. You will automatically evaluate them on an instinctive level for symbiotic fit. Are they a foot while you are a hand? Then you figure out how you are meant to work together, all on a subconscious level.
We experience the desire to reject when we experience non-recognition. To the degree that someone fails to impress our instinctive mind as “healthy” is the degree to which we will attempt to disconnect from them.
Couples do that in fights. “I don’t know what to do with you. Go away.” Even saying, “I don’t know you anymore.” It has no literal meaning, and they know all they need to know intellectually, but their instincts are not clicking with their partner at that moment. Over time, that can become a poison relationship.
Now some strain is natural from time to time. Perhaps like muscle tissue, mutual effort tends to put the people involved a bit out of sorts, out of shape, and given rest their relationship gets stronger, but sometimes this doesn’t happen. Why is that?
One or both have developed what amounts to an auto immune response to the other. They have adopted an emotional antigen that reacts every time they contact that person. Sometimes it’s not really intentional, and sometimes it is intentional and even willful.
They restrict who they are and thus restrict everyone in relationship to them? Indeed. That is the immune response in essence, not an opening or growth, but a restriction or elimination.
So it is helping block the invading emotion? It can do that, yes. Turning empathy to antipathy, feeling for a person to feeling against the person.
Each person has what amounts to social or emotional DNA. This DNA might be what they refer to in the memetic theory, but I suspect it goes deeper than that. Memetics would be more like an epigenetic influence.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.