We have survived as long as we have not for our normal humans. They tend to function sort of like deer caught in headlights. They just stand confused or just keep doing what they are doing. We have survived because some of our kind had natural traits so strong they couldn’t conform to our unnatural ideas and prejudices.
Did today go as you expected friends? There is a lot of teaching against expectation in today’s spiritual circles is there not? Almost as if it were a serious moral faux pas. Anyone gotten rid of it yet? If you have rid yourself of expectations, how did you do it?
- Don’t plan anything just let it happen.
- I don’t expect. I try to create. This is very good. I think you might be jumping ahead a bit. I like that. It just means people understand.
- We create the expectation of the class by being here? No. You never create expectations. They happen like bowel movements or they happen like constipation.
- Because of past experiences? If they happen from past experiences that’s more like the constipation, but just because you’re blocked doesn’t mean the process is wrong in its entirety. Though blocked, expectation does tend to make people belly ache. Sort of a natural consequence I guess.
Creation is a way to forego expectation if you get good at it? It is and it isn’t. You have to have a measure of expectation in that you have the capacity for anticipation for a reason. It’s not just an aberration to test our faith in some other principle.
Ah expectation is “bad” only if you stick to it too rigidly? Yes, and I am confident we all have this experience. Rigid expectation is how successful?
- Frustration, Uncreative. It is. Even destructive by way of stagnation.
Maybe it depends on if other people share the same expectations as you do? Hmm, well there is a problem there. The group grows as individuals, so any group expectation is ultimately still temporary.
The big C word comes into play a lot. Compromise. Being married means making many of those, at least to me it does. Ah, compromise. Funny that we insist on compromise. One of the literal meanings is to have integrity be suborned, weakened, and does it have any other meaning really?
If you can not show weakness with confidence to your spouse, then who can you show it to? Hmm, perhaps you need not compromise so much as show awareness of your spouses process also? Make choices that put your motion in harmony with his or hers?
If he is really set on something being his way then I usually just let it be. Most of the time it is not so important how things are done. If you step on your partners toes does that mean you have to stop dancing? I find if you think about dancing, plan it out, you will never dance. You will forever be refining the dance in your head, but you can dance and be aware at the same time. As they move forward you move back. When they move back you don’t remain in retreat do you? The leader leads as service to the lead or the dance breaks, and with open awareness you can lead without ego and follow without compromise.
I had a man call me a lunatic just about an hour ago, because I did not mention love in this discussion of expectations. He was half right. Love is implied, so I will go into that. Love is a rapport with what is a willingness to let something be what it is, and to be what you are in its presence. Anyone disagree? If so that’s welcome too, but the secret to not falling into blind expectation is to not fall out of touch. The reason expectation as a mental process can have bad effects is that people form the expectation first, and then go looking for something to link that to sight unseen. How successful is that?
That happens often in dating. Regrettably it does, and thus relationships fail almost as a matter of course, but there is another way. They look for the need. Yes, and never get it filled, because it never can be. Not that way, but there is another way. Can I get across the room I am in, if I ignore that I am seated in this chair? As special as that accomplishment might be.
In fact, I cannot. I must first be aware of my chair. I have expectations about my physical reality. Without doing the act of expecting anything, I just accept how my mind works, and with this anticipation of how reality works I move quite easily across the room. Does this work the same way for everyone? No, but with that connection they can find their personal way across the room, or another way that satisfies whatever need they had that would have moved them to cross the room.
Sometimes I just throw something. Sometimes just throwing something works quite satisfactorily, but sometimes throwing something doesn’t put it where we expect it to go.
It depends on the blockages? Yes indeed, it does depend on the blockages. Problem is, blockages are false. Real but false. Gravity is real, but people fly routinely even escaping the circumstance of gravity.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.