'Regret' Chapter


The source of our regret is not failed outcomes, it’s false identification. We look at outcomes and incorrectly interpret them as a reflection of self, and declare that “we failed” rather than seeing the intended outcome as just not yet achieved. When we fail to achieve our outcome, we often create an oppositional relationship with one or more entities, people, God, life, the world. This relationship exists only in our heads.

What determines the character of your actions is the focus of your attention. Your attention determines your reality. Your actions will always be in coherence with your reality, which is your attention. If your attention is on cheating, then everything and everyone is a cheat. When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves – regret for the past and fear of the future.” Fulton Oursler

“Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.” Sydney Smith (English Clergyman, Essayist and Wit, 1771-1845)

“Forget regret, or life is yours to miss.” Jonathan Larson

Why Do We Regret?

I will begin by defining regret in contrast to other states. What does it mean to regret nothing? If I say I regret nothing, I am saying my actions are totally in keeping with my intention, is this not so?… Seek More

Attention To Pattern

I feel forced to resort to metaphor now. Ever notice a tree as it grows can break even something much “tougher” than it? If close to a foundation it can damage it, so yes. And if not break it then… Seek More

True To Yourself

Onto what’s right about regret. You can be aware of inequities in your intentions, and actions, and consequences. This deduction is actually very useful and a source for self informed and self directed decision making, but does “future regret” have… Seek More

Move Or Be Moved

What is static? Static is not order, and it’s not unchanging. It’s just unplugged, unadaptive. We are not meant to be neutral. Even if you see emotion as something to be managed and subordinated to reason, your thinking is still… Seek More

Not Trying

There is the doing aspect, being in the moment, but what of planning the events and adapting to situations where it arises? That’s its own doing, and your quality of thinking will be much better if you allow your mind… Seek More

Dealing With Regret

I fluctuate back and forth between regret and acceptance. Regret is an internal struggle that you don’t have to do. I feel I’ve learned a lot from what I’ve done, but sometimes the regret of all of it comes back.… Seek More

Mis-Identified Intent

Regret is a complicated feeling state, and the mind has more depth than is commonly considered when we tackle our challenges in daily life. Let’s start with the root of consciousness, the subconscious mind. It has been established that it… Seek More

Take Back Thinking

I make the point of being present in my life, experiencing consciously. This is a good attitude to sustain. It’s also potentially challenging as the mind is very busy and quite good at attention getting. This is its function, but does… Seek More

Congruent With Attention

If someone tells me their regrets, I can tell both their attention focus and their intention, but does that mean they are locked into that state? They don’t have to be. Why not? State of regret. They could choose present… Seek More