If there is any reality then you are real, and your choices are based on you.
Desirous of peers is one thing, desirous of personal union another? You will have no genuine union with a peer until you have genuine union with self. Otherwise the world is as ashes on the tongue, present but it feels empty. By comparison, you can’t give to another what you don’t have.
Personal integrity is a personal responsibility and personal integrity is what people seek most, though they often don’t know it. Living in accordance to your personal standards is essential, and those are discovered in self confrontation not in buying into a social mass hysteria. Have you found much in the way of realistic standards or behaviors in cultural values? Cultural values are relative? So simply put no? Relativity is inherently the denial of realism. It denies shared experience.
To realize that we are one? There is a bottom line reality. We are all in this world. It’s losing touch with that bottom line that leads us to feeling lonely. Seeing my world instead of the world. Seeing my problems instead of events in the world.
The most glaring loneliness is in the affairs of the heart, the desire to be special and joined with one? Yes and even long married couples see ‘my relationship’ or ‘my role’, rather than the dynamic of communication and relating.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.