The trick is you think you were tricked. There is no deceit only paths to truth.
Loneliness is an interesting topic though at first it might seem quite shallow. We all feel we experience it and we are all right, but the question is why? Why in this great heavily human populated world do we feel lonesome? Any ideas?
- Fear to open your soul?
- We forget we are connected?
- No communications skills?
All true, but what do we fear?
- To be hurt.
- That one won’t be understood.
Do we really fear that we will be hurt? There are people who stay in abusive relationships and are hurt all the time even if only emotionally. Apparently they fear something other than emotional wounds, no?
- Fear of being isolated?
That is an interesting though paradoxical truth.
- Fear to be alone and face the world with nobody beside us even as a mask?
Ultimately, it’s about those masks. Fear that we are not connected and though we fear we are not connected, we busily do the things that make us believe we are not connected because we are taught it’s real. We’re taught that reality is getting a job (role), getting married (role), having kids (role), growing old (role), and then death (fact), and yet for all those roles something in us isn’t satisfied. It doesn’t feel safe, and is never at peace. Is this true for you?
Rotten life and then we fucking die? Basically, and then even morbid ideas and sentiments at the funeral. People feel loss, but not of the person. Each person at that funeral will have viewed the departed in a totally different way. They mourn the loss of context, believing it to be the reality of what they had. But I offer; Have not your most powerful contacts with your parents been when you realized that they were human and lonely? If you never had that experience what would happen if you did? Ever experience your mother or father when they really just needed a hug?
Realization of your own responsibility for your life. The expectation of not being perfect is dropped and you see who they really are. Indeed. No role. No ‘I’m the father’, no ‘I’m the mother’, just ‘I am who I am’. People cling to roles and declare themselves responsible. Roles are scripts, and honestly aren’t they false identities?
I would consider them a set of rules? And what end do those rules ultimately serve? There are facts of experience; you were born, you did have parents in the literal sense but in their role as parents beyond the very instinctive protect and care for the baby, things get really complicated from there don’t they? And they can even get complicated before that.
Wouldn’t a mother’s role connect her to her family? I would say that it’s the mother’s feelings and instincts that actually connect her. It’s the role that burns her out later and makes her resentful, but even the common ground is unstable.
If I tell you I’m someones father, which is a literal fact, it would give you some understanding. But if you spun off into the assumed connections, maybe memories of your own father or prejudices of what a father is supposed to be, positive or negative, how realistic are these usually?
As we grow, they become more realistic? They become more realistic because they fall away.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.