Not having what you want won’t make you saintly. If you’re damned if you do, and damned if you don’t, you might as well go ahead.
Eros and logos, passion and reason, should be married in the psyche, in the mind. Mind unrooted in passion can justify hideous behaviour as being logical. Passion unconnected to reason lacks any expressive power, and thus loses its transformative potential.
The Gorgon is the avatar of the venomous quality of reason. Once bitten by a cold line of thought, the whole awareness can become calcified. But the Gorgon became what she was because of her dalliance with the great abyss. This was a compensation for the fearful depth of passion and mystery that sought to woo her in the figure of Poseidon. Two characters rather clearly illustrating the two extremes.
This is what makes many men the way they are. Stephen King in his novel “Pet Cemetery” comments on how a man’s heart is stony. This is the kiss of the Gorgon. Can a man be all reason and have any passion in him? He has to allow himself to be wooed, gentled by the hand of one with greater wisdom than he. This is why women often feel there man is perhaps somewhat dull witted. It’s not because he had any intellectual weaknesses, but he may appear to because he has a hard time letting an idea go and moving into that part of his awareness that is Eros, that is open to relating and perceiving something fully as it is. One has to be gentle to be adaptable, and one has to be adaptable to be wise.
How do you help the man to let go a little? Speak to his heart if he will let you. It may appear he isn’t listening to that, but if he is open to you, you will very likely be surprised. I tend to be a rabid thinker, really berserk in a way. Every once in a while my wife will point out something simple, and beautiful, and I will let myself take a moment to just appreciate it with her. I am working on making that awareness last longer, but I listen to her in the first place not because she makes me, but instead because she lets me.
She does something unforgivable. Want to know what that is? If I’m not careful, she makes me see myself as a beautiful person. Men are capable of it. It’s a bit more accepted in artists, but it can be reached in any man, at least potentially.
Are you talking about physical beauty? Oh, not physical beauty necessarily, but that is not left out.
Her punishment for this unforgivable sin? Her punishment for her transgression, and one she doesn’t necessarily take very well, is to be seen as beautiful herself and told with all sincerity that she is wonderful. She still hasn’t fully accepted that, so I catch her off guard doing wonderful things, being insightful about stuff, and kind to people, patient and understanding, as well as passionate and principled. She is really amazing, if I do say so myself. I have ways of making her feel loved!
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.