Look within and look around. You are not lost.
Everyone tends to understand things best if they start in a particular way. They can take on any other point of view sure, but they will not understand it as well as they could if it had started on the right foot, started with the right path.
My own reason for sudden shifts of mood in conversations is that I understand things best as events, actions taken. I can come to understand the feelings behind anything, the thinking behind it as well, but if I have to understand whatever it is outside of my natural starting path, my understanding will be incomplete and distorted.
I often have to tell myself, just get started, just do it. I never have to tell myself that. Why I don’t just start things is I don’t have the immediate circumstance that would spur that chain of events. I can talk freely and in depth when conversing with someone live, but when looking at a blank page, I am just looking at a blank page. I can get to the point where I can write. It usually involves filling my mind with so much activity that I feel moved to narrate it.
I have found that if I need to do something I don’t want to do, it’s best for me to start reading about it, do research, get myself thinking about it in depth, and then the motivation will materialize by itself. Gnani before Bhakti in that explanation, and does that really ever differ for you?
I have a Karma temperament. My wife has a Gnani temperament. With my wife and I, when we are out shopping, I see that we are in the purchasing context, that if she knows what she is looking for we should find it and purchase it, and she is never comfortable until she has had time to examine things and consider her choices in further depth. She has to work up to the decision. For her, the store is a place of examining her choices. For me, it’s a place of making my choices.
I have come to see shopping as a series of events in her decision making process, and I respond to each phase as I intuit may be proper either with simple observations and expressions of opinion, to the point of actually carrying her purchase to the counter. Does this seem strange? This experience and behaviour doesn’t differ for me, should it?
I even understand personal interaction as a set of events and physical behaviours to the point where I will even interrupt an ongoing activity, because I know this will allow people’s heads to clear. Every thought that someone might have, feeling they might be experiencing, is always in an event context, and the event is often open to being changed even if the mood itself doesn’t seem to be. So, I feel no need to shift out of my action based orientation. Am I misguided in this?
Is life better when things seem amorphic? Perhaps I am missing out on something. According to scientific opinion I am. This is the reason the autism diagnosis exists at all, otherwise it would just be cognitive deficit.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.