You can learn from good things. It requires a different skill set maybe. Today’s culture doesn’t teach us. It teaches us to solve problems. To look for issues and “fix” that.
Is happiness the indicator of success? Yes, when you are self fulfilled then you are successful. It’s more than most peoples understanding of happiness. When you are on your path, it just feels right. Everything feels right.
Happiness is a state of mind? No, true happiness is a state of being. Contentment is another valid descriptor. Even ecstasy in the religious sense. You are enlightened when you see your deepest self, and it isn’t any more complicated than that. To see the dark side in you is as valid as the light. Others expecting you to be something, just one thing, is a mistaken notion. They do you a disservice.
Seeing your dark side helps with your path? It is where I started. You will favour one or the other like handedness, and either way you aren’t “evil”. All of your virtues come from your challenges. All of your strengths from your weaknesses. They are just fact. I don’t believe in evil in the biblical sense, but it is a commonly used idea. It causes war and bloodshed.
These emotions, feelings, thoughts and behaviours… You won’t and can’t find peace by denial. It just is a false denial of your responsibility. You don’t have to wallow either. Your temperament is natural, dark or light. You find peace by accepting your inner nature.
How do we learn not to wallow? Don’t learn not to wallow, that is how to learn not to wallow. Don’t treat your dark side as a problem.
How do you find the inner nature? Meditation, reflection, simple self observation. If you see that you tend to be negative, just see it. Just accept it. It can take over, and that isn’t bad. If any negative feeling is heavily weighted it is for a reason. There is a real issue there. It doesn’t make you not responsible. Let it be, and you be there with it. You might find you show a wisdom in this darkness that you didn’t know you had.
I am having trouble knowing where to start. Well, your nature colors your world. You live in you, and you may have been trying to “improve” it. It’s alive because you are, and we aren’t machines to be improved.
Are you in anger often? Yes. I will confess something. I am in a state of almost constant rage. I’m also often “too honest”. Right now I do feel anger. It underscores everything. Like shining a black light on all of life. In fact, when I’m trying to be happy is when I lose control of it. If everything is making you angry, then what can actually make you angry? The reaction goes. I let my anger be. I don’t react to it, and when I let it be and don’t try to fix it, I find I can feel other things also, like love and happiness.
You don’t give energy to your anger by accepting it? By choosing to control it, you feed it. You make it something you must control.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.