Any experience you have that does not bring you peace, you failed to accept. To the degree you feel removed from a peaceful state, you have a list of rejections.
The acquisition of energy and thus manifest traits cannot be stopped, but its pacing can be controlled and its path directed, at least to a large degree. The direction aging will take you in is the same as it took you in when you were still physically immature. That model just gets more and more overstated with some cases of radical mid life change, but usually not.
Describe yourself now and I will be able to describe what you were like as a younger person, both event wise and internally. I will be able to project (at least loosely) events that will manifest in your near future, because these are just expressions of the internal self image or heaven forbid the e-word, ego.
Describe ourselves in what way? General thumbnail summary because that’s what we keep anyway at our core. A generalization of our internal spirit or what we have been lead to believe that is.
I’m easy going. Don’t like arguments. Love new ideas. Music. Try to find something good about whatever situation I’m in. Working on getting into better shape. Have been feeling drained about having to work, tired a lot. Ok. You are the good girl. You have lived your life in such a way that you have taken on the characteristics of the long suffering martyr. Fatigue, which in time can lead to heart problems. Self denial, which can lead to digestive issues and diabetes, and you are already showing the signs of visual impairment as you have made yourself see things in the best possible light. This tends to strain the eyes as they don’t know the difference between literal light and metaphorical light. As far as events go, you have likely experienced stability for the most part as other people tend to see you as the cornerstone of their own personal stability as well as their leaning post. Your career will likely go far as long as you want it to until you get sick of it, if you ever do, and you will have repeated instances of social and emotional encounters that make you feel depersonalized. That you are what you do for people and nothing more. Did I miss anything, and is this in error?
That sounds about right. I don’t have it down to a science, but you have also likely had repeated urinary infections or other complications, and are also likely showing the early signs of sugar sensitivity. Is this correct?
I used to have some UTIs, but haven’t in a long time. I have been trying to cut down on sugar. Yes, and then sugar related burn out.
What can I do to make things better? What you should do is allow yourself an outlet for aggression. Go to a gym perhaps and beat the sand out of a punching bag, or anything that will allow the adrenal glands to work. Intense rock music, angry imagery in art, the possible expressions are pretty broad, and I am not suggesting you violate your own morals. Just give permission for your inner instinctive self to vent that way also. It’s a pretty common need and you aren’t psycho, just intensely frustrated.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.