Life is too short for doubt. Whatever you doubt you either really want to do it, or you don’t. So do or don’t, and move on I say.
Typically, people decide they like you or they don’t like you, and very little will change their mind. So I find it useful to pay attention to those who have decided to be my enemy, because I have learned that people will do bad things to someone they don’t like. Honestly, I don’t think it’s that black and white.
I will be bluntly honest. I do not like most people. I simply don’t like them. I am not comfortable with them. I don’t understand them. I also don’t hate them. I don’t care to belittle or attack them. I don’t want to hurt them or take anything from them. Honestly, I will even help them. I don’t have to like someone to be willing to help them. I like games, and I especially like games where everyone can play. I prefer it when everyone can play freely and is having fun, so I happily help. I have found that by doing so I can even discover more to like about the person I helped, because even taking a moment to help is a form of play. Otherwise, why do children find playing school so attractive? People like to be played with. They hate to be worked with. How many people do you work with? How many of those like you? Any? Do you like your doctors? Do you really like your spiritual leaders? Your philosophical role models?
I don’t like to make pals with people I work with, with people who compete for pay cheques. They compete because supposedly it’s not a game, and they “have to.” Honestly, even when I was homeless and hungry and had no social connections, there was nothing I literally had to do. I did not have to survive. I did not have to do anything about trying. Off and on I even didn’t really care that much. There were moments where I actually ate and drank just because it was available and someone prompted me to. I really didn’t care that I was being fed. I honestly even turned down some options.
But you did survived and found family. What was the thing that gave vitality back? What gave vitality back… A young man came looking at a homeless shelter, just a couple years older than me. He understood very well that I wasn’t going to be good at anything. I even told him so. He said, “I know, but are you willing?” I said yes, so he said well come on then, and we went to work, and they kept working with me for as long as they could. My issues didn’t matter as much as what we were all experiencing, and they came on hard times so I did have to move on. That young man who became a dear friend, a brother to me, was killed in a train collision, but someone let me play, and friends I met during that time let me play. My weirdness didn’t matter. They didn’t know how to take me, at least to start, and for a while that was really a glorious time. Though I succeeded at nothing, I experience more than I can really describe, and I saw that there was meaning in people, not just philosophy and religion and art which was my shelter as a youth, and well, I have kept at it even though it doesn’t pay.
I have to function with a lot of faith, but in my wife my faith is well placed, and I don’t worry about little things. I mostly focus on that path that always called me and won’t stop calling me whether it finds acceptance and support in other people or not. In a way, I honestly can’t help myself but follow that path. My life is now more vibrant and full, and my energy level, well … Would you say it’s changed at all?
It’s better, definitely. How much better? And in what way? Why would you say it’s better?
You’re more active and engaged. Why would you say that is? Happier. Would you describe my energy level as almost hyper?
At times, yes. She “complains” that I keep her going, doing things.
You want to go more places then I do.
I honestly didn’t know I could feel like I do with her, but I definitely do.
So any questions about vitality? Does it seem to be the same as communication or am I missing something? If so maybe that could be our next class topic? I might have to let some chicken and rice or something communicate with me soon.
I think there is definitely a correlation.
Vitality is communicating about what my creative path is, that I need to try new ways and I feel like I’m talking nonsense. Please communicate that nonsense. Just focus on the non part. It’s is the french word no. It might help to visualize Grumpy cat at the same time.
I feel like I’m full of nonsense most of the time. Try that. When you begin to think of your views as nonsense, visualize Grumpy cat captioned with the word no. That is what I would say to you.
Grumpy cat cheers me up. Grumpy cat conveys a profound truth. It’s really not that serious. You really aren’t being judged in any meaningful way. If you met that cat in person there would be purrs and leg rubbing, maybe some playfulness as dour as he looks.
I need a cat. I do recommend cats if you feel you can adopt one, or a dog if it’s more your speed, but definitely an animal companion if you feel you can handle one.
Till next time friends, keep in communication with yourself. Honestly, you rarely call and likely never write. What is a self to do? Why wouldn’t your self nag you?
The self should also learn how to pick up a phone. It does. It’s called feelings and dreams.
Your thoughts are welcome. Be well friends.